Yes. there will be moments in life when u want people to care for u and listen to how u feel. There will be moments when u have to choose in a very complex circumstances. There will be moments when u just want to cry for hours. Just cry if u must. Especially if u are a girl. U know what I mean. Let it all out and then stand back up again. Find Allah. Tak, bukan nak cakap time susah ja cari Allah. TAK. Everytime kita kena ingat Allah. But if u just feel down and sad, the first one u kena cari is HIM. Express everything to Him. Then, seperti ada miracle mesti lepas tu u become more stronger than before. And lebih tenang. 

Today is 1st January 2014. 4 years ago at this moment Im crying because I lost my one and only brother. He's suffering leukemia. After undergo few times chemotherapy, he's getting better. After a year the disease attacked him again. He was admitted at Penang hospital (where the place for critical case located). This time I know, he's time is near. The night before he pass away I sempat suap dia makan, bring him to the toilet and sempat salam and kiss him for the last time. when the visit time dah habis, i need to go and i know this is might be the last time i can see his face. I want to cry, but I tahan tahan tahan sampai rumah. 

In the morning, I got a phone call from my mom he is critical and dah tak sedar diri, only depends on machine pernafasan. at 3pm Allah takes him. That day i need to be strong to my mom and my family. everything are on me now. I know after this everything is under my responsibility. I need to be strong no matter what. Until today, I still can feel that he's still alive. He lent me his strength bcos when he still alive he is the strong man. He never cry. He never mad to anyone. He's very patience. He's the best brother and son also the best friend to anyone. I still remember, on the day he pass away, too many people are coming sampai penuh rumah and masjid. time pengbumian pon ramai gila turun nak kebumikan dia. I know everyone sangat terasa akan kehilangan arwah. No one can replace him because he's always the best man in my life. 

Al Fatihah to my late brother MOHD DINIE BIN AZMI.